Family jokes
What do blind people and orphans have in common?
They both can’t see their parents.
Your children grew up faster than it took you to leave for the milk.
They told me throwing babies was bad, but guess what I did yesterday? I threw my baby cousin down the escalator.
What is cold and alone?
An orphan's parent.
Why can't two Chinese people have a white baby? Because two "wongs" don't make a "white."
Why is it that orphans love Frisbees so much?
Because they return eventually.
What's the difference between cotton and an orphan?
One gets picked.
Why do orphans go to church?
Because they have someone to call "Father."
Why do orphans love going to church?
Because they can call someone "father."
My mom is bad and my dad is bad.
What’s the only advantage of being an orphan?
Nobody makes jokes about yo mamma.
What is the thing that orphans miss the most?
Their parents.
What's the worst TV series for orphans?
Family Guy.
Q: Why can kids relate to dogs?
A: They are noticed for 13 years, then left for no one to touch again.
What is old, cold, and alone?
An orphan's parents.
Why do orphans have no sense of humor?
I guess they've never heard a dad joke.
Why can't orphans fail a test?
Because the teacher is gonna ask their parents to sign it.
One of my family members died on 9/11, he was one of the best pilots in the Middle East.
The emo kid's mom went to jail because the kid was hung.
Why do orphans like boomerangs? Because they actually came back...