Tazzaro got me like: 😂
Teacher: *Reads mythological story about a cyclops*
Me: Does he have one eye cause he's from an incestual family in Alabama?
What are you doing, son? It has been an hour, and you are still in front of the mirror closing your eyes.
Mum, actually I want to see how I look while sleeping...
When you're sitting by the mushrooms and you hear one say to the other "Hey, you're a fun guy."
Why are your eyes blue? Cuz they have food coloring in them.
Can u see me
So, I remember growing my own peanuts really well. There's one that's larger than the others. I can't keep my eye off of it.
I'm scared that it moves at night.
I'm being serious. I literally can't keep my eye off it.
Why are you rolling your eyes? Are you looking for your brain?
Do you know the teacher that went up in space? She had blew eyes. One blew this way and one blew that way.
Why did the chicken cross the road to Popeyes Chicken?
It wanted to pop some chicken eyes...
Sauron said, "Eye see all."
Vital information: if you find a stray dog in an alleyway, don't stare at its eyes.
The more they smile, the less they see.
I got to work.
Ben: Oh no, my boss is here. I hate my job and I'm terrified of my boss.
Ben: Uh, hey, hey Mr. Boss.
Boss: Have a nice day.
Ben: Ok, bye!
Boss:??
What do you call a dick with three eyes?
Preston.
What do nerds and chicks have in common? They both have four eyes.
A kid decided to burn his house down.
His dad watched, tears in his eyes. He put his arm around the mom and said, "That's arson."
Me: You have pretty eyes.
Her: Thank you.
Me: I can make them roll back 😈🥴
What did Rob O'Neill say before he shot Osama Bin Laden between the eyes?
"Go to HELLakbar!"
"Hola, soy Dora. Do you see the cliff? Say, "backpack." Tell her that we need Amanda. While I push her off the cliff, you will not peek. Did you just peek? Close your eyes, you silly goose." The end.
