Existence jokes

Q: Why didn’t Santa eat the milk and cookies you set out for him?

A: He doesn’t exist, you childish sh**!

What do your teacher and your friend have in common?

They will both die eventually.

Karolien's life.

There never was a historical Jesus Christ. Hey, do not even dream of crucifying me.

I hear you like funny people. In fact, my whole life's a joke!

I am not making a noose; I am making an unsubscribe button for life.

I am going to be a ghost for Halloween. I actually want to be a ghost every day, because at least I'd be dead.

Has anyone alive ever died?

Is this our eternal life?

I could be red, I could be orange, I could be yellow, I could be green, I could be blue, I could be purple, but I would be dead.

What is the difference between a suicidal person and you? You're not dead.

Knock knock.

Who’s there?

Die.

Die who?

Me, I want to die.

Me and my friend's life story on a daily basis.

Wanna hear a funny joke?

John's life.

A different version of you exists in the minds of everyone that knows you.

What do you call a man in the ground? A dead guy.

We cut and kill flowers because they're pretty.

We cut and kill ourselves because we are not.

My joke is:

My life.

Bro, yo mama so fat Thanos had to clap her out of existence.

Life is like a penis.

Women make it hard.

My therapist said to try having a different outlook on life.

I agree. I should have a different outlook on life. Preferably from underground.