Entertainment jokes

I just watched a documentary on marijuana. I think all documentaries should be watched this way.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping bag?

One's made of plastic and is dangerous for children to play with, the other one carries your shopping.

What was the favorite game in 2001? Flight simulator.

"Waiter, my steak is too skinny."

"It's a strip steak, sir."

"At these prices, it should not only strip, but sing and dance too!"

What is a cow's favorite move? -- The sound of moooosic.

I was playing Mortal Kombat with my friend when he picked the fighter Pristiano Penaldo. I won and the voice didn't say "Finish him," so I couldn't do a fatality.

I was confused, but I understood that the game didn't let me finish him because he is already finished.

I love murder shows... wish me luck cause I'm kinda hoping to be on one one day.

What's in a Michael Jackson hotdog?

A 50-year-old piece of meat.

A 12-year-old bun.

What do kidnappers and Mickey Mouse have in common? They say, "Come inside, it’s fun inside."

What do you call an emo filming their suicide?

America's Funniest Home Videos.

What is a pedophile's favorite song?

Jerking off in A minor.

I remember the first time I went to one of Luis Fonsi's concerts...

I wanted to commit DEATHpacito so badly.

I once heard my dad shout, "I'm going to be like Frozen and let it go!" Then I heard a gunshot.

The good thing about dead baby jokes is that they never get old.

The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.

A bartender says, “We don’t serve time travelers in here!”

A time traveler walks into a bar.

What do you call a porn star that always goes back for more?

Craven Morehead.

What's the best thing about dead baby jokes?

They never get old.

Why did Cinderella get kicked out of Disneyland?

Because she sat on Pinocchio's face and said, "Lie, bastard, lie!"

When someone tells me to kill myself,

Panic! At The Disco: Don't Threaten Me With A Good Time.