Global warming is the average of temperature on Earth.
Yo mama so fat, she went to the moon without leaving Earth.
Yo mama so fat when she walks the earth talks!
LMAO
God: I feel like I'm forgetting something... oh no, Earth! *sees it on fire* Oh, it's fine.
People of Earth: *running and screaming*
Santen: *to God* Really?
Your forehead is so big, the earth split in half!
I came across a pic of the oldest man on earth on IG. He was 132 years old.
I commented "age is just a number" for him; now I'm banned.
What do you call plane crash victims?
Down to earth people.
How do flat-earthers travel?
On a plane.
What keeps you breathing when you're on Earth?
I don't know. I suffocated at birth.
What do you get when a dog that is actually a Weeto is caught in an earthquake?
Just like a chocolate milkshake, only crunchy!
🌍: You're so hot!
🌎: How are you single?
☀️: I burn anyone who gets too close!
What is the thirstiest ocean in the world?
The Gulf of Mexico lol!
How does the earth rate its sex?
Earthquake, Cataclysm, Volcano explosion, Earth's core explodes.
If the earth's core explodes, then he got tore up!
What's the difference between Mars and Africa? Mars has water.
They say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Well, apparently, no one has ever been standing next to you.
Adam and Eve had 3 male children, the only children on Earth. How did they reproduce?
Why couldn't the NASA astronaut enter his rocket to leave earth?
There wasn't enough space to fly it.
Why did the doctor check out Earth?
He had a tummy quake.
Geology rocks!
Little Johnny was sitting in class, and he was behind a girl called Sally. The teacher asks the class, “Who created the Earth?” And Little Johnny pokes Sally in the back with his sharpened pencil, and she jumps and says, “MY GOD!” And the teacher says, “Yes, Sally, God did create the Earth.” Sally sits down.
Then, the teacher asks, “Where do you go after you live a good life?” and Little Johnny pokes Sally again, and she jumps up and says, “HEAVENS TO BETSY!” And the teacher says, “Yes Sally. You will go to heaven after you live a good life.” Sally sits down, knowing full well Little Johnny was poking her. Sally gave Little Johnny an angry glare, and she turns around.
And then, the teacher asks the class, “What did Eve say to Adam after their 77th child?” and Little Johnny pokes Sally HARDER this time in the back, and Sally jumps, turns around, and says, “If you stick that thing in me one more time, I swear I’m gonna lose it!” And the teacher faints.
