Earth jokes

What do you call the closest plant to the sun? The hot ball.

I made Google Earth for orphan kids.

Sadly, it does not show where home is.

Q: Why did the fault line start acting crazy?

A: Because it was on crack.

What is blue, green, flat, and has teeth?

The Earth, but I lied about the teeth.

A boy walks into class with a shirt, pants, underwear, and socks. The teacher says, "Where have you been?" The boy says, "On a peach hill."

Another boy walks in with a shirt, pants, underwear, and socks. The teacher says, "Where have you been?" The boy says, "On a peach hill."

Then a girl walks in, and the teacher says, "And where on earth have you been?" The girl says, "Well, you see..." Then the teacher stops her and says, "Let me guess, on a peach hill?" The girl says, "No, on 2 big cucumbers."

It’s me back at it again.

The earth was flat till they buried yo mama!!!

What can a rock possibly say?

Answer: I'll fuck ya mum rock hard.

I don't even know why to joke about America, it's a joke itself TO THE FUCKING EARTH!

What did the sun say to the Earth?

"Am I hot?"

Vegans: Save the Earth.

Normal People: We're trying to, but you guys keep eating it!

Battery 1%.

I take one last look at Earth as my suit runs out of power.

Why is it so hard to make a party on Earth?

Because you need to planet.

The annoying orange told the annoying, insecure, beta bitch orange that he wants to be the most annoying thing on Earth again.

Women be like if men are gone, Earth would be a better place, (forgetting) women help to create war, weapons, animal and human cruelty, and have helped to enforce laws that oppress them.

What if plants are farming us, giving us oxygen until we die, and turn into natural fertilizer which helps them?

Yo mama so fat, when she landed on the earth, the earth cracked like eggs. LOL.

Why is the ocean so salty?

Because the land doesn't wave back! 🤣

🚘 What is as old as the earth 🌎 and new every month? The moon.

The COVID-19 situation has been especially stressful for the Flat Earth Society.

They fear that social distancing measures could push people over the edge.

I came across a pic of the oldest man on earth on IG. He was 132 years old.

I commented "age is just a number" for him; now I'm banned.