Yesterday I was in a wind storm.
Today my ears hurt. I guess the wind was ear-itating.
Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.
Ayo, the pizza here... OH NlGGA! AHHHHH!... Augh, my ears burn!
A father awaits the birth of his first child.
The obstetrician says, "Unfortunately, he has no arms."
The father says, "I'll love it all the same."
But the obstetrician adds, "It is also without legs, trunk, head."
The father says, "I'll love it all the same."
Then the obstetrician confessed to him, "I'm sorry, but only this ear was born."
The father says, "I'll love it all the same."
And the obstetrician says, "Talk to him closer: he's deaf!"
What do you call a animal with 3 eyes 2 mouth 6 noses and 4 ears
What has 8 legs and 2 ears?a dog 🐶
I said something in your ear, and then it echoed because of the size of your forehead because your brain [is] small.
Little Johnny's neighbor just had a baby. He got invited to dinner with his neighbor. Little Johnny's dad said if he mentioned "ears" he will get a spank.
So Johnny looked in the bassinet. They were talking about the new baby. Johnny's mum said, "What beautiful eyes."
"That is great," said little Johnny, "because he will be stuffed if he needed glasses."
How much do pirate earrings cost? 🤔 Answer: a buck an ear. 🤣
What do you call a bear with no ear? A b
Why don't humans eat raw meat? Because they use technology to cry about raw meat is good. Go and leave, bro, I'm going to eat sushi.
Me people call me emo.
Older cousin: Why?
Because I always have my hood up and wear black cloths and wear black cross earrings.
What did the skeleton pull out from behind his ear?
Nothing. Skeletons don’t have ears.
Person: My left ear is ringing.
Friend: Then answer it!
What do you call a deer with no ear?
One ear.
A drunk guy is showing friends his new apartment.
The last stop is the bedroom, where a big brass gong sits next to the bed.
"What's that gong for?" the friend asks him.
"It's not a gong," the drunk replies. "It's a talking clock."
"How does it work?"
The guy picks up a hammer, gives the gong an ear-shattering pound, and steps back.
Suddenly, someone on the other side of the wall screams, "For God's sake, you asshole, it's 3:30 in the god damn morning!"
I have 3 eyes, 2 ears, and 6 mouths, what am I?
UGLY!
It's this girl named Deaf, what a weird name, but I know that 'cause I was ear hustling.
But anyway, everytime I call her, she doesn't answer. I wanna clap some cheeks tonight, how could she hate me when she don't know me?
What do you call an ear that's dead? Deaf. Hahaha! Oh wait...
In fields of gold, where sunshine beams, Monkeys swing and play, it's their dreams. Their fur so soft, their eyes so bright, Picking cotton with delight.
Their little hands so quick and neat, Plucking the cotton, can't be beat. They chatter and laugh, they dance and play, In the fields all day, they'll stay.
Their tails so long, their ears so big, They're quite the sight, it's quite a gig. They're busy as can be, you see, In the fields of cotton, they're free.
So let us marvel at these little thieves, In the fields of gold, they give and receive. Their antics bring us joy and delight, In the fields of cotton, they're always right.
