Drug jokes
Nancy be like, "Don't do drugs, do cock!"
What is a snake's favorite drug?
Adder-all.
What’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!
What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!
What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!
I constantly wonder how people can live happily ever after, but then I realized that antidepressants don't make you OD.
How's George Floyd doing these days? Being drug-free for a year, he must be feeling pretty swell.
What do you call an epileptic kid on cocaine?
An earthquake.
Heyyy, in the last six months, [I had] 4 suicide attempts, broke up with 3 girls, and my mom went on drugs.
Why shouldn’t you do drugs? Weedle make you high.
How can Pikachu make a baby laugh? By playing pika-boo!
What’s the last balloon George Floyd blew up? His heroin balloon.
Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke some mairawanah.
Jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said, "I know you wanna," but dumb-ass Jill forgot her pills, and now they have 12 kids.
Why do crack heads like to do it doggy style?
So one can peep out window and one can peep on floor.
How many crack heads does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, there is no electricity.
Why did the duck cross the road to get to his quack dealer?
What do you call Canadian weed? Canadabis.
If a midget does meth, does he get high or get medium?
What did rapper Pop Smoke get high off of? Cigarettes with Pop and Smoke.
Grass for lash.
Guys, my girlfriend calls me: "911, help! There’s a strange man in my room and I think he’s on drugs!"
She’s so nice.
I have tried coke; it is not my cup of tea.
Yo mama so fat, she got arrested for carrying ten pounds of crack.