If you ever feel depressed, drink some coffee.
Expresso Expresso, no more depresso!
Why did the emo leave the bar?
Because it was happy hour.
What's the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag?
The tea bag stays in the cup longer.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
The past, the present, and the future walk into a bar...
It was tense.
Man walks up to a priest. The man says "I am Jesus Christ." The priest says "No you are not my son." The man says " Follow me." The man walks into the bar and the bartender says "Jesus Christ your back!"
Chuck Norris decided to sell his urine as an energy drink, which you now know as RedBull
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
I Am glass! People see right through me.
Pennywise: They all float down here! Titanic: *hold my beer*
a man walks into a bar, and notices a steak hanging from the ceiling. when he asks the bartender about it, the bartender says "If you can jump up and hit it, drinks are on the house for the night, but if you miss, everyone's drinks are on your tab for the next two hours. Do you want to try?" the man decided not to take the risk. he thought the steaks where too high.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
How did the hipster burn his tongue? -- He drank his coffee before it was cool.
A priest, a rapist, a pedophile and a homosexual walk into a bar...
He orders a drink.
A guy goes onto a rooftop bar, and is sitting next to a guy who says he's drinking a magical drink. He asks "What's so magical about it?" the guy drives a car and flies it around the rooftop. the other tries, but falls of and dies.
The bartender shakes his head, and says.
"Y'know, you're a real jerk when you're drunk superman.
Two termites walk into a bar. One asks, "Is the bar tender here?"
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
A priest and a pedophile walk into a bar. The bar tender says "Hey Jim!"
A drunk walks into and says, "All lawyers are a$$holes!" A guy at the other end of the bar says, "I resent that!" The drunk says, "Why, are you a lawyer?" and the other guy says, "No, I'm an a$$hole!"
