Dont

Dont jokes

Evan, this is Mya, and your mom told me you were adopted, so we are done. Bye, don’t talk to me.

What's the difference between a blonde and a refrigerator?

Refrigerators don't queef when you pull your meat out.

Why don't vegetarians moan during sex?

Because they don't want to admit that meat makes them happy.

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  • I have a lot of eggcellent egg puns, get the yolk... Oh come on, don't be hard-boiled!

    Guy 1: P-gay or T-gay?

    Guy 2: P-gay sounds cooler.

    Guy 1: Yeah me too. I don't like P-ewDiePie, always love T-series.

    Guy 2: Omg what did i just say? I wasn't even knowing what were you talking about :<

    Guy 1: Like I do care :$

    Guy 3: But I do care :<

    Guy 1: F*ck you.

    Guy 3: Do it.

    Guy 2: But you do care about me.

    Guy 3: No.

    Guy 2: F*ck you.

    Guy 3: Do it.

    :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

    Guy 1: Why is my cat so angry?

    Guy 2: Because she wants to eat your big sausage.

    Guy 1: Don't you?

    Guy 2: Yeah, it seems delicious.

    Guy 1: Mmm, so... w-wait what are you doing? I didn't think you meant the one in my lunch :< Where are you leaving #_#

    **Meow...**

    Guy 1: Shut up, I will never feed you this sausage. It's not for you :< -_- </3

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  • I made a bunch of jokes about unemployed people. Sadly, all of them don't work.

    Johnny was watching TV when he heard them say "bitch" and "bastard," so he asked his dad, "What is a bitch and bastard?"

    Dad said, "A bitch is a female, and a bastard is a male."

    Then Johnny goes back to the TV and hears them say "ass" and "shit," so he asks his dad what "shit" and "ass" means. Dad says, "A shit is shaving cream, like what I'm putting on my face, and ass is a coat. Why don't you bug your mom?"

    So Johnny goes back to the TV, and then they say "fuck," so Johnny asks his mom what "fuck" means. Mom says, "Fuck means carving, like doing to the turkey." Then a few minutes later, Johnny hears a knock on the door, so he answers it. He then says, "Welcome, bitch and bastard, may I tack your ass?" The people then ask where his parents are. Johnny says, "My dad is putting shit on his face, and my mom is fucking the turkey."

    Depression, I got it.

    A girlfriend, don't got it.

    A life, don't got it.

    Help, got it.

    Friends, don't got it.

    Family, I got it.

    Best of all, depression, I got it!!!!!!

    - What did the skeleton say to his friend?

    - Actually... TIBIA honest, I don't know how to complete this joke...