DOE jokes
What does a Right-Winger say when he sees a rainbow above the sky?
"A colorful sky? That's too woke for me. Jesus and our ancestors would have never stood for this!"
All of a guy's sons came out gay. He ordered 10 shots in a bar.
The bartender asks, "Do you have anyone in your family who likes women?"
The man said, "My wife does!"
Why does Santa have such a big sack? He only comes once a year.
The Egyptian god of sun's name is Ka.
My friend: Where does the sun god go to get a shoe?
Me: In a Ka-boot sale :D
Friend: What would happen when someone stole the shoe?
Me: Call The Police Ka!!!
What does Germany and the rest of the world have in common? They both use gases to poison one thing or another.
Shitpost-master general
Credit to my boy tippecanoe3 for this joke.
What do you call it when Panera isn’t hungry?
Panera fed.
Credit to RogueRobot for this one:
What does Panera sleep in?
Panera bed.
Two cannibals were eating a clown when one looked at the other and asked, "Does this taste funny to you?"
What does my dad have in common with Nemo?
They both can’t be found.
What does an eighty-year-old woman have in between her boobs that a twenty-year-old woman doesn't?
A belly button.
What does a queen want on her cookie?
Royal Icing.
Why does Africa have no pharmacies? Because you can't have medicine on an empty stomach.
How does the zebra cross the road?
The zebra crossing.
Teacher: Ok class, good morning. We are going to start off by asking what kind of sound animals make.
Teacher: Ok, what sound does a pig make?
Class: A cow says "moo moo."
Teacher: Good!
Teacher: What does a sheep make?
Class: A sheep says "baa baaa."
Teacher: Good! Now, what does a pig say?
Little Johnny: A pig says, "Put your hands up and get against the wall, you stupid mother fucker!"
What does Michael Jackson ask little boys before going to bed? Are you sleeping?
What does a pizza and a Mexican have in common?
One can feed a family.
What does an orphan wish they could do?
Wish happy Mother's Day and Father's Day.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how many you throw.
Why does Wet have a big head? Because he got hit by a wetaroid!
Why does a penis taste like octopus 🐙?
Stupid question 😒 🙄 even the catholic church ⛪ 🙏 knows that one.
What does a cigarette and a hamster have in common?
Both are completely harmless until you put it in your mouth and light it on fire.