DOE jokes
What show does an orphan hate? Family Feud.
What do the Titanic and the Montréal Canadiens have in common? They both sank to the bottom of the Atlantic.
What does a cow say? Moo.
What movie does an orphan hate?
- No Way Home.
What does the handicapped man say to the cops when he’s mistaken for a criminal: "Don't shoot, I'm unarmed!"
Memes
How much work does a skeleton get done?
A SKELE-TON!
What commitment does a pimp make to each new hoe he turns out?
Answer: He will always be there for her after the break-in period.
What does the policeman say to the jumper?
"Hey! Pullover!"
How does the zebra cross the road?
The zebra crossing.
Why does Waldo wear stripes?
'Cause he doesn't want to be spotted.
If having sex for money makes you a wh*re, then what does having sex for free make you?
Non-profit wh*reganisation.
What does Michael Jackson and caviar have so much in common?
They both come on little white crackers.
How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
One to change the bulb and one to suck my dick.
Does Eminem like M\&M's? Cause if he didn't, that would be like "they're" not liking "there."
What does my arm have in common with paper?
They both can be cut.
What does Jeffrey Dahmer and Travis Scott have in common?
Eight dead people.
What does a woman and a hurricane have in common?
They’re nice and wet at first, but in the end they take everything.
What does a mother fear most?
Hearing "YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER!" for 5 different men.
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None, that's a hardware problem.
Jimmy does stand up comedy. He says, "What do you call an orangutan?"
Jake replies, "YOU!" Then everyone, including the teacher, laughs. Jimmy cries.
LOL