DOE jokes
What do Michael Jackson and Linus have in common? They both carry a little blanket.
Why does Michael Jackson like 44-year-olds? There's 4 of them.
What does Michael Jackson like to eat? Little wieners.
What does Jeffrey Dahmer and Travis Scott have in common?
Eight dead people.
When does a joke become a dad joke? When it leaves you and never comes back.
Memes
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None, that's a hardware problem.
What does an orphan call a family picture?
A selfie.
How many men does it take to open a bottle of beer?
A: None, it should be opened by the time she brings it.
What does a lesbian and a sea turtle have in common?
They both choke on plastic.
Does Lightning McQueen get life insurance or car insurance?
Why does a milking stool have 3 legs?
Because the cow has the udder one.
Why does Hitler wear glasses? Because he can Nazi without them.
What does a transgender call his/her parent?
Transparent.
Your mama is so short, she does backflips under her bed.
Why does the sky think it's so powerful?
Because it's always looking down on us.
What does Drake call his rake?
Da-Rake.
Jimmy does stand up comedy. He says, "What do you call an orangutan?"
Jake replies, "YOU!" Then everyone, including the teacher, laughs. Jimmy cries.
LOL
What do you call a large lamp that does illicit things to young children?
A Jacko Lantern!
How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?
Out of a catalogue. đ
Why does Michael Jackson do positions with kids in photos? Because they wonât do the same for him.