If a deaf kid swears in sign language, does his mom wash his hands with soap?
DOE Jokes
What does a pregnant slave and a payless sale have in common?
Buy one, get one free.
How many dyslexics does it take to change a lightbulb?
Steven.
What school does a depressed middle school kid go to?
KMS.
You know that if it says, "Adopt a Highway" and no one does, we're driving on orphans.
What does Johnny Depp hate about driving a car?
He can't drink and drive.
Why does Santa have such a big sack? He only comes once a year.
How does the zebra cross the road?
The zebra crossing.
How much work does a skeleton get done?
A SKELE-TON!
What does the policeman say to the jumper?
"Hey! Pullover!"
Does Eminem like M\&M's? Cause if he didn't, that would be like "they're" not liking "there."
Why does Michael Jackson like 44-year-olds? There's 4 of them.
What do Michael Jackson and Linus have in common? They both carry a little blanket.
What does Michael Jackson like to eat? Little wieners.
What does a woman and a hurricane have in common?
They’re nice and wet at first, but in the end they take everything.
When does a joke become a dad joke? When it leaves you and never comes back.
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None, that's a hardware problem.
What does an orphan call a family picture?
A selfie.
How many men does it take to open a bottle of beer?
A: None, it should be opened by the time she brings it.
What does a lesbian and a sea turtle have in common?
They both choke on plastic.
