DOE jokes
How many dead strippers does it take to change a light?
At least 13 because my basement is still dark.
When I masturbate, things cum.
When an old man does, no one cums.
How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
5
4 to turn the table, and 1 to hold the bulb.
How does a blonde turn off the light after having sex?
She opens the car door.
What food does a cheetah eat?
Fast food.
Why does Stephen Hawking always say he's got so many bitches?
Because he is never around Siri.
What does a dyslexic zombie eat? Brian's, hahahahaha!
How does a crazy person get to the woods?
He takes the psychopath.
A rooster ran across the border from the USA to Canada and laid an egg. Which country does that egg belong to?
Roosters don't lay eggs.
What weapon does a fat Jedi use?
A heavy saber.
What does a robot do after a one night stand?
He nuts 'n bolts!
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how big they are and how hard you throw them.
What does a baby in a blender look like?
I don’t know, I close my eyes when I masturbate.
The judge asked me, "How does 5 to 10 years sound?"
I said, "Sexy."
How many wives does Santa have?
Ho Ho Ho!
What kind of car does Yoda drive? A Toyoda.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
What does a skeleton say when it has a lot of stuff?
"I have a skele-TON of stuff to do."
What kind of mountain does everyone like?
Mountain Dew!!! Hahah.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them.