What runs but does not walk? It's water.
DOE Jokes
So I added Paul Walker on Xbox the other day, and it’s annoying cause all he does is sit on the dashboard.
What does a pulse and an orgasm have in common?
I don't care if she has one.
Why does Waldo wear stripes?
'Cause he doesn't want to be spotted.
If a kid does not go to sleep during nap time, isn't he resisting a rest?
What does Stephen Hawking say after sex? That was wheely good.
What does a cow sound like when in a horror house?
Moo mooo moooooooo (screaming)!
What does a homeless man call his mother?
Useless.
How does Moses make his cup of tea?
He brews it.
A man walks into a bar and orders 3 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What's got you down?"
The man says, "I just found out my niece is gay." The next day, he orders 4 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What's got you down now?" The man says, "I just found out my son is gay."
The next day, he orders 6 shots of whiskey. The bartender says, "Got anybody who likes women?" The man says, "My wife does."
What does your mum and Istanbul have in common?
They are all insane comebacks!!!
What did Homer Simpson say when he ran over a deer? "DOE!"
What song does Saturn sing?
"If you like it then you should have put a ring on it."
What does this joke and half a deck of cards have in common?
You can't even deal with it!
So, a bear and a rabbit are in a field. The bear turns to the rabbit and asks, "Does your poop stick to your fur?" The rabbit replied, "No." Then the bear picks up the rabbit and wipes his butt.
Teacher: *Reads mythological story about a cyclops*
Me: Does he have one eye cause he's from an incestual family in Alabama?
First Man: My dog's got no nose.
Second Man: How does he smell?
First Man: Awful.
What does an apple and a lawyer have in common?
They both look good hanging from a tree.
What does a butt do when it is angry?
Butt crack!
What does the Fox say?
Fraka - kaka - kaka - kow.
