Disabled jokes
What do you call a disabled person drowning?
A boat.
I walked up to a man, and he said, "How's the weather up there?" and then I pushed him into the street to get hit by a bus.
Trying to find a good parking spot is a lot like trying to find a girlfriend.
If you can’t find one, you stick it in the disabled spot and hope nobody finds out.
Why did they call off the leper hockey game?
There was a face-off in the corner.
When I saw a kid fall with no legs, I said, "Just walk it off!"
What do you call a disabled person that can walk?
Enabled.
What do you call a bunch of wheelchairs on top of one another?
A vegetable rack.
A slag is like the first piece of bread in a loaf. Everyone touches it, but nobody wants it.
Why can't people with Tourette's learn to drive?
Because they'll cause a car crash.
A handicapped person tells a good joke, but he can't be a stand up comedian.
One time in my dream, I had a dream that all people in wheelchairs could walk. It was awesome; I could walk!
Me and a wheelchair person were playing tag, and I broke my leg so it can be fair for him.
There is a young man smoking and a woman in a wheelchair. The woman says, "Why is a young man like you smoking?" The man turns around and says, "Why the fuck are you wearing trainers?"
Why are handicap signs blue? Because they're all Crips. (sorry)
Why do physically disabled gay men like performing blowjobs on well-endowed, abled-bodied gay men?
Because physically disabled gay men prefer eating pepperoni than eating sausage links for dinner 🍽
What's simultaneously up and down?
A retard on a plane.
What do you call a person with no arms?
Armless.
Daryll
What is a disabled person's least favorite song?
"I'm Still Standing."
I pushed a disabled kid down a busy road and yelled out, "Mario Kart!"