Disabled jokes
What does a disabled person want to be when they grow up? A stand-up comedian.
One day I met a blind guy and I said, "You should see Mt. Cheaha!"
"Brown bear, brown bear, what do you see?" I see a blind man looking at me.
"Blind man, blind man, what do you see?"
Oh sorry, I forgot you can't see.
What did the blind man say to his dog after eating dinner?
"Just ate a tasty steak!"
My mum's a carrot.
I bet a disabled kid on a wheelchair that if he could catch me, I'd give him 1000 dollars. He said deal, and I went upstairs.
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
An RC-XD.
Why can't people with Tourette's learn to drive?
Because they'll cause a car crash.
What do you call a disabled kid who is blind?
A grape chilli bean.
What do you call a disabled kid with a gun?
Special forces.
What does a lesbian call the other during sex?
Mummy.
If you watch Jaws backwards, it's a heartwarming story about a shark that gives arms and legs to disabled people.
A cannibal went to the dietitian, and he got told to eat more vegetables, so he ate a disabled person.
If you get pinched by a man in a wheelchair, can you call it a "hit and can't run?"
What do you call an Asian who can't hear?
Wha U Sai
What's the only part of a vegetable you cannot eat?
Wheelchair.
Some say Stephen Hawking was a genius, but I never heard him say anything intelligent.
I stole a wheelchair from a disabled kid. What is he going to do, stand up?
Why did the wheels not move on his wheelchair?
Because he had no legs.
What games would deaf people not be good at?
Simon says and Musical chairs.