Disability jokes
Two guys are on the playground. One guy says to the other, "Did you know that Hellen Keller had a playground in her backyard?" The other guy said, "No." The first guy says, "Neither did she."
What's the worst thing about having a Congolese friend?
He always needs a hand.
What do you call getting gonorrhea from a disabled person?
A slow clap.
How do you piss off a disabled person?
You put the cookie on the other shoulder.
I gave a deaf kid air pods for his birthday.
We don't read backwards.
What do you call a bunch of bi-racial, retarded kids? Mixed vegetables.
I have a friend who has no arms, her name is Suzy. I always tell her this one knock knock joke, "Knock Knock!" "Who's there?" Not Suzy.
So, Helen Keller walks into a bar... And then a table.
What did the Asian people name their retarded son?
Sum Ting Wong.
How do you shut Helen Keller up?
You give her mittens.
What do you call a disabled person in a sauna?
Steamed veggies!
What was Stephen Hawking's last meal?
Meals on wheels.
What do you call an army of disabled people?
Special forces.
What did the little girl with no arms get for Christmas?
I don't know, she's still trying to open it...
Why did Susie fall off the swing?
She had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Susie.
What's black and sits at the top of the stairs?
Stephen Hawking in a house fire.
How does Stephen Hawking go to the toilet? He logs out.
What's a person with Down syndrome's favorite detergent?
Downy.
Did you know that Helen Keller had a dog?
Well, neither did she!