Disability jokes
What time is it when you can drive a house? Time to get a wheelchair.
What did the blind kid get for Christmas? He hasn’t seen it yet... What did the kids with no arms get? He doesn’t know, he’s still trying to figure out how to open it. :))))
Yo mama so dumb, when I told her my blind friend couldn’t see, she said, “Open yo eyes!”
Can disabled enable dark mode?
My girlfriend broke up with me, so I stole her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?
Why did Stephen Hawking go to his fridge but get nothing out?
It was a dummy run.
Have you ever seen a blind man swim?
No.
Neither has he.
Someone tracked down a cripple and said, "You can hide, but you can't run!"
What is better, autism or Down syndrome?
What is the autistic woman’s favorite Dorito flavor?
Neurospicy.
Stephen Hawking drove too far away from the wall and unplugged himself.
Wanna know why Stephen Hawking died?
He lost his Wi-Fi connection.
What do you call a person in a wheelchair?
Virgin Mobile.
How do blind people know when to stop wiping?
With a taste test.
Stephen Hawking tried comedy.
His first line ruined it. "You know what I can't stand? Let me rephrase that, you know what? I can't stand."
Why did the leper fail his driving test?
He left his foot on the clutch.
What do you call a kid on a wheelchair?
Hot Wheels.
One day I met a blind guy and I said, "You should see Mt. Cheaha!"
I bought my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday.
He said it was the most violent book he’s ever read.
What's a Parkinson's victim's least favorite song?
Taylor Swift - "Shake it Off".