Disability jokes
How did Helen Keller die?
Her ex gave her plutonium and told her to eat it.
People in wheelchairs should really stand up for themselves!
What is the difference between an orphan and a blind kid?
They both can’t see their parents. 😂😂😂😂😂
Why did the rapist go after the mute? It would be a silent attack.
I have cripple and depression.
I was bullying Stephen Hawking. I told him, "Why not stand up for yourself?"
How do you know your acne is getting out of hand? The blind start reading your face.
What was Helen Keller's favorite game when she was a kid?
I spy.
What’s Helen Keller’s favorite game as a kid?
I spy.
Why did Helen Keller sign the n-word?
She thought she was black.
Playing hide and seek with Helen Keller wasn’t the best idea you’ve had all day.
I wonder if Stephen Hawking was an organ donor because I need new parts for my go-kart.
To the guy in a wheelchair who stole my camouflage coat: you can hide, but you can't run.
What's black and sits at the top of the stairs?
Stephen Hawking during a house fire.
My friend who is in a wheelchair told me a joke, and I burst out laughing. I told him he should be a stand-up comedian.
My friend in a wheelchair tells a funny joke.
I resist the urge to say that he should become a stand-up comedian.
Son: Dad, what's a morbid joke?
Father: Walk over to a homeless man and throw a rock at him, then you will know.
Son: But Dad, I don't have arms or legs.
Father: Now you know.
What makes Stephen Hawking and your dumped girlfriend similar?
They can't stand up for themselves.
What do you call a blind kid with an eye patch and no arms?
Names.
How do you call an autistic kid with a pistol?
Special forces.