Disability jokes

How did Helen Keller’s parents punish her? They handed her a basketball and told her to “read this book”.

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  • Why did Susie get cut from the soccer team? She has no legs!

    Who broke into my house by kicking down my door? Not Susie... But she still is in my basement, since she can't run!

    Why does the disabled person scrunch his toilet paper up? Because that’s the way he rolls.

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  • Have you heard about the new movie with Stephen Hawking as the star? It's called "Unplugged."

    If you put an amputee with no limbs in a snuggie, it becomes a stubbie.

    There's a new horror movie about Stephen Hawking.

    It's called "Unplugged!"

    Have you ever heard Stephen Hawking sing?

    "Head, shoulders, wheels and frames, wheels and frames!"

    Don't use Head and Shoulders, just use Head; otherwise, you'll end up in the retarded situation Stephen Hawking went through.