Difference jokes
What's the difference between Chris Brown and Santa?
Santa stops at three hoes.
What's the difference between a Syrian kindergarten and an ISIS hospital?
I wouldn't know, I'm just the drone operator.
Q. What's the difference between a Kevlar vest and a CEO?
A. The CEO isn't bulletproof.
What's the difference between the milkman and my dad?
Nothing, they are both one thing except he never returns with milk.
(I've been eating cereal with water COMBINATION!)
What's the difference between you and a bench?
A bench can hold a family.
Husband: “Honey, what’s the difference between a Ferrari and an erection?”
Wife: “ok... what is it?”
Husband: “I don’t have a Ferrari right now.”
What’s the difference between your dad and your hairline?
Nothing, they both ran off.
What’s the Difference Between a Cat and a Comma?
One has claws at the end of its paws, and the other is a pause at the end of a clause.
What's the difference between milk and a cancer patient?
There's none, they both don't age well.
What is the difference between a baby and a sweet potato?
About 140 calories.
What's the difference between an emo and a banana?
They both hang like apples.
What’s the difference between an ant and an orphan?
The ant knows where home is.
What’s the difference between Pikachu and an orphan?
Pikachu, I choose you!
What’s the difference between your boyfriend and a condom?
A. Condoms have evolved. They’re not so thick and insensitive anymore.
What's the difference between Paul Walker and a fly? It's the sound they make when they hit the windshield.
Yo mama so fat, her cheeks are in different time zones.
What's the difference between a light bulb and a woman?
You can screw and unscrew a light bulb, but you can't unscrew a woman.
What's the difference between an orphan and a second-hand book?
The second-hand book was loved once.
What's the difference between a coat hanger and an emo?
Nothing, they both hang.
What’s the difference between a child and someone who has been kidnapped?
One of them is a domesticated pet.