Difference jokes

What’s the difference between your sister and a bowling ball?

I can only get 3 fingers in a bowling ball!

What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?

One says, "God is my father." The other says, "Who's the father and who is my son?"

Horrible Jokes, Part One- A friend of mine got into photographing salmon in different clothing. He said he liked shooting fish in apparel.

What's the difference between a cop and a bullet?

When a bullet kills someone, it gets fired.

What’s the difference between my sister-in-law and a driveway?

I pull out of the driveway.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?

One's plastic and dangerous to play with; the other is to carry groceries.

What's the difference between a prostitute and a daredevil? One has cunning stunts, whilst the other has a stunning...

What is the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus?

One is hairy and smells like fish, and the other is a walrus. You're welcome.

What's the difference between the Twin Towers and an ugly girl? The Twin Towers at least got fucked.

- The emo went to give the tree a high five, but the emo was left hanging.

- How did the gay person die? Homicide.

- Why did the emo get kicked out of the amusement park? He was cutting in line.

- When does a joke turn into a dad joke? When it leaves and never comes back.

- I cried when my dad chopped onions. Onions was such a good dog.

- I have happy memories building sandcastles with my dad, until my mom took his urn away.

- How is the person over there different from cancer? His dad didn't beat cancer.

What’s the difference between being a genius and being an idiot?

Being a genius has its limits.

What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?

One serves the nailed to the cross, one nailed by her boss.

What's the difference between a black Jew and a white Jew?

The black Jew sits in the back of the oven.

What’s the difference between a cancer patient and a British news reporter in the South?

They usually don’t live to tell the tale.

What's the difference between Madeline McCann and Batman? Batman returns.

Him: What's the difference between Incestry.com and Ancestry.com?

Her: What?

Him: Nothing, either way you will be dating your cousin.

What's the difference in Japanese Kamikaze and 9/11?

There is none, they both go up in flames.

What's the difference between Johnny Depp and an Aussie bloke in Bali?

Both are expert drunks, but the Aussie is 100 times better kept. Johnny Depp, in contrast, looks like a demented leader of a violent drug cartel.

What is the difference between a sloth and a depressed kid? A sloth doesn't need a rope to hang.

What's the difference between drugs and kids?

I don't sell drugs.