Die jokes
The patient said, "When will this be over?"
The doctor said, "After you die."
The patient says, "Was that a morbid joke?"
The doctor says, "Well, um, actually, you'll die because we broke the needles and the cure."
The patient says, "Well, it's a bright day, maybe if you weren't clumsy!"
Why do people not adhere to the corona measures?
Because they hate their lives and want to die.
What do you tell your butt cheek when you need to use the bathroom? "Hold it in, so you won't get constipated and die."
You die. LOL!
How do you make a plumber die?
You kill his family.
Ama is a bitch. I want him to die and kill himself.
How did Jesus kill himself?
He fell from his bike.
How many times did he die?
Once on a bike and once when he fell from a cloud in Heaven.
Time for a random Terraria joke.
Q: Why did the guide die at his house?
A: The player dropped his doll in the lava.
(WALL OF FLESH HAS AWOKEN) :| Oh crap!
I was making a bet with my grandfather about who would die first. I said that I would die first.
He said "Bet" and died after he drank his coffee.
He was my least favorite grandparent.
Can I die?
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To die on the other side.
Why doesn't Africa have pharmacies?
Because you can't take drugs on an empty stomach.
Can some hot depressed suicidal guy give me his number so we can cry about being depressed and wanting to die?
Why did Hitler die? He got hit by 'ler'.
My sister said to kill myself, so now I’m in the hospital hoping to die.
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
If Trump pooped in a toilet, the toilet would die.
How do stars die? Usually a overdose in an airport.
When I die, I want my body to be cremated.
And fucked! Fucked really hard, papí!! Like a real whore!! Like a real tramp!! Stuff your entire cock in there!!! Uhh!! Uhh!!
I put my heart and soul in my report, then my teacher says:
"Hey KIDS were going to repeat making current events about our state til we DIE."
....No wonder when kids leave school they're soulless.
RIP Meh Soul.