Dick's jokes
My dick itches.
I heard guns kill people, so I gave up my right to own one.
Then I heard dicks rape people, so I chopped it off.
Why is my dick like a balloon? The more you blow it, the bigger it gets.
Why don't feminists like to eat hotdogs? Because they remind them of men's dicks.
What's the difference between an American school and a shooting range?
My dick doesn't get hard at the shooting range.
Fancy playing rodeo sex?
"OK then," she said!
Then put your dick in her ass and say it’s not as tight as your sister’s ass and hold on for dear life... real life cow bow boy shit!
Guys, why are we being racist? Why can't we love each other, please? Gimme that dick, boy. Please stop fighting. Let's love each other and them big ole dicks, please. Gimme that dick. I hate racism.
I saw a lady in a bikini on the beach, so I walked up to her and said, "LET ME STICK MY DICK UP YOUR BIG ASS!"
What do you call a dick playing badminton?
A shuttlecock.
Suck my dick!
(Ron Jeremy)
Lol, dick, I'm the dick and duck.
Bully: "I bet your dick is so small when you look down in the shower you can't even see it."
Guy: "No, I see your sister's head."
Do you know Candice?
Nope.
Candice dick fit in your mouth.
My boyfriend recently asked me to suck his cock. I was kinda nervous because I’ve never tasted a dick, but he said it doesn’t taste that bad, so I’ll give it a shot.
I hate it when people say to suck it up... I mean, sometimes I don’t want someone’s dick in my face.
What can a dwarf do standing up that a tall person can't do standing up?
Suck dick.
Chuck Norris' dick is so big that it has its own dick. And his dick's dick is still bigger than Bruce Lee.
Calculate my dick, virgins!
My man is a pussy cunt that sucks my dick.
Joke's on him, he just asked me for bobs and vegana.
Jarod (😏): Man, Breya Smith is so hot! The things I would do!
Y’uree (😟): Yes, but... she moved, remember? Her father found a new “job”, so she is now leaving until the fall.
Jarod (😞): Ah yes! BECAUSE!!!
Y’uree (😯): I don’t know, bitch. Maybe she has other things to do, or we can give her a good gangbang before she leaves!
Jarod: (😒): No, I really want to fuck her by myself!
Jarod (🤔): Hmmmmmmm... mhmmmmmm... ummmmm... hmmmmmm... not a bad idea!
Jarod (🤨): Or not?
Y’uree (🙄): Shut up, man!
Jarod (😠): NO, I mean it! THAT GIRL HAS THE BEST ASS FOR ORAL SEX!
Y’uree (🙄😒): Bruh... listen... gangbang... sex... the same
Halyei (😊): Hello Y’uree and Jarod. How are you guys today?
Y’uree (😏): Well, sexy girls like you should be ass-fucked or fucked so hard that all you can do is talk or nothing at all?
Halyei (😘): Thank you, I suck dicks too!
Jarod (😒): Are you Breya???
Halyei (😕): No... do I like that flying bastard???
Jarod (😣): Ugh... no... baby, you’re free to go!
Halyei (😔): Sorry, I miss cursing and having sex with her too! (😟) Sorry for being an idiot. (😔) I really miss her. (🤔) Maybe you and I can give her a threesome??? (🙄) No, I’m not gay! ( ) WHY!!! (😌) Can you come to the please fuck me! It’s the fuckable girls contest and I want to win! (😨) Sorry!