Desire jokes
What's the only good part of your crush dying before you have the chance to bang her?
She can't say no!
What does a girl want more than anything in the world?
Nothing. She's fine.
#takemebacksophie
Roses are red, violets are blue, your penis smells like stew, and I want to eat it too.
What is a suicidal horny person's job?
A butcher.
Im still alive and im going to make it everyones problem
How is sex like air?
It’s not a big deal unless you aren’t getting any.
She really wanted a boner.
Both man and woman have balls, but they like to play with the ball of each other because a person always loves what they don't have. 😁
But she hasn't tried the position with her new boyfriend, so she invites him to a romantic dinner.
After dinner, she tells her boyfriend about her desire for it, but her boyfriend was clueless about such acts, so she tells him to strip naked on the couch and lay on top of him naked in the 69 position. She starts sucking him off and starts waiting for him to do the same, but the bf didn't know what to do, so he just lay there. Suddenly, the girl had an urge to fart but held it in because her asshole was right near his bf's face. Suddenly, she loses control and lets one out. She apologizes profusely and continues sucking him. A couple of minutes later, she feels the urge again and lets another fart rip near his face. The BF throws the girl from the couch, gets up, and says, "Bitch if you think I'll be lying here for 67 more of those, you're fucking crazy."
I like strippers on me.
I raped a girl and I liked it.
I hope my girlfriend won't mind it.
It felt so wrong, it felt so right.
Don't mean I'm in love tonight.
How do you get your appeal for rape charges accepted? Say you were expressing your desire for a woman, which is protected under the Constitution in freedom of expression.
What's the difference between a gun and my will to live? None, they are both absent.
I'm horny and gay.
Guy 1: Why is my cat so angry?
Guy 2: Because she wants to eat your big sausage.
Guy 1: Don't you?
Guy 2: Yeah, it seems delicious.
Guy 1: Mmm, so... w-wait what are you doing? I didn't think you meant the one in my lunch :< Where are you leaving #_#
**Meow...**
Guy 1: Shut up, I will never feed you this sausage. It's not for you :< -_- </3
Woman: I want a man who is 6 feet and 6 inches.
Man: Is 6 feet and 6 inches one thing or two?
Woman: Two, I want a man who is 6 feet and also is 6 inches.
Man: Shit!
If being near immortal was a normal thing, I bet wanting to die would've been too.
Why do orphans try to be arrested? So that they'll be wanted.
I want your weight, not your phone number.
Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your wife needs Jon Grudon, too.