Desire jokes

A FedEx plane was carrying 375 fridges across Africa, but the cargo door wasn't shut properly, and only 218 reached the desired destination. The rest landed in a remote village. How many fell out the plane?

Time's up! You took too long; you only had 4 seconds to answer it.

How do you put an elephant into the fridge that pushed out the cargo door?

Open the fridge, put the elephant in, and close the door.

How do you put a giraffe into the fridge?

Open the fridge, take out the elephant. Then put in the giraffe and close the door.

Why did Sally fall off the swing?

Because she got hit by the other 156 refrigerators.

How did she survive?

Her idiot mother tried to pull her out and accidentally ripped both her arms off, but she was rescued 8 minutes later.

Three friends go to a water park and meet a genie. "You each get one wish." "When you get to the top of the slide, you shall scream your wish as you go down." The first man went down the slide and screamed "Coca Cola," and the pool was filled with Coca-Cola.

The next ugly-ass looking mf goes down the slide and screams "C-M&Ms" as if he wasn’t just about to say cum—then the pool was full of cu—I mean M&Ms. The last horny-ass bitch is so excited he says "Weee!" Then the pool is full of piss. He was upset the pool wasn’t full of dildos./j

I wish I was rich and not poor and retarded.

Roses are red, Foxes are orange, I like your butt, Let me touch it forever.

My dick is hard as a rock, anyone wanna fuck?

What do dino nuggies and the brown M&M have in common?

I want to fuck them both.

I've got something better for all of you. I may not have found it, but Google "hottest sexiest women ever." Then you'll want them!

You know I wish life was shorter?

I want it over.

I’m horny who else is *ugh ugh papi harder*.

Roses are red, violets are blue, my bed has room for 2 ;)

When I die, I want my body to be cremated.

And fucked! Fucked really hard, papí!! Like a real whore!! Like a real tramp!! Stuff your entire cock in there!!! Uhh!! Uhh!!

Why am I naughty?

Because I want to be....

Me: *sprays some perfume on myself*

Friend: Omg, that smells so good! You’re so aromatic, how do you not have a bf yet?

Me: ... I’m aromantic and aromatic. I do not desire romantic relationships with others although I do enjoy carrying lovely scents with me.

It’s funny my sister wanted to have sex with me.

I think I need to kiss your butt.

Happy birthday to you, you look like a ball, can’t fit in my jaws, I try to suck it.

Want to have sex?

Kaden wants to have sex with you.

You know sex is better than logic, but I could've proved it...

Q. What's the Premier of Alberta's favorite sex toy? A. I don't know, but I wish it were me.