A leaf and an emo fell off a cliff, who landed first? The leaf, because the rope stopped the emo.
One day a man buys a rope to commit suicide, but his friend stops him.
They go to a school with lots of happy kids. The guy feels better after a mag.
When there's no piñata at the party, but the emo kid just hung himself.
Why does every emo kid try to be like Tarzan? So they can swing on the vine.
A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: “Well, I hope you like changing nappies/diapers”.
She replies: “Oh my god am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?”
To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”
I asked the emo kid if he was depressed that his phone died before him
I asked my mom what her biggest regret was for a project at school, and she said, "Oh, go look in the bathroom above the sink..." There was a mirror.
Why did the cheetah get sad?
'Cause it didn't have any balls to suck.
This is not really a joke, but it's a question.
If life is a movie, then is death life? Is we seeing the trailer right now?
I think about my life, and then I think about death. I prefer death. If you ask me, life is just a time when you die. Basically, death is life, meaningless 0-0.
Noose: "Hey man, wanna hang out?"
Corpse: "Sorry man, I'm dead inside."
When I die, I'll let everyone I kept dear lower my coffin into the ground.
So they can let me down one last time.
- Sometimes I feel like killing myself...
- But?
- ...
Keep yourself safe!
What do ninjas and depressed people have in common?
They're always cutting.
What’s the difference between depression and your ex?
Depression fucks you harder.
My biology teacher told us "get out nice and sharp colored pencils." Does she mean as sharp as in the blades I use to cut myself?
What does a depressed kid who loves geometry use to kill themself?
A hypoteNUSE!
Every depressed person just has to say, "I WANT TO JUMP OFF THAT TALL BUILDING RIGHT THERE!" and then points to the building and runs up to it like an immature child, and then they get disappointed when they aren't allowed into the building.
I'm going to piss on the floor.
Read if gay.
Aha!
