My mom trying to get me to do dishes

Mom: I gave you life and you should be able to wash dishes.

Me: Why did you?

Mom: I was very drunk…

Explains a lot…

knock knock

whos there

crippling Depression

crippling Depression wh–

ME

wanna hear a funny joke? well that was why you where here… heres the joke Your life :)

Whats a depressed persons favorite drink?

Depresso espresso

Who works at IHOP? A girl with one leg. P1: Why did the chicken cross the road? P2: To get to the other side DUH?!? P1: No dumbass, its to get run over because he has depression, a chronic illness, and his father left him for a good for nothing pimp that doesn’t even give a shit about how he feels. (Kinda like me). P2: Holy shitr u ok? Some random eavesdropping fucker dials 911 in a hurry

A depressed man was caught on top of the empire state building with marijuana, needless to say, he didn’t want to come down.

You got a black cat. He was bad luck. Everyone left you and you comited suicide. What a CATastrophe.

Please check your spelling before clicking ‘Submit’. Thank you for your entry. ❤

Getting murdered by someone is probably the most intimate experience I’ll ever have.

Are you a grave, 'cause I want you on me

a girl and her brother are walking in their garden POV:Brother. Sister:Why are you cutting those flowers?

Brother; because their beautiful!

Sister:I thought you said you cut yourself because you aren’t.

Brother:…

Wow, Heavens alot hotter than I thought it’d be.

me:why did the chicken cross the road

person:why

me:because he wanted to

What is long brown and cured depression.

A nuse.

My depressed body would look great hanging from a tree…

Mom: Wake up!

Me: No, I’m too disappointed and I have a headache…

Mom: Why are you disappointed?

Me: I took 12 random pills and I still woke up…

Is depression sadness or happiness? I call it a fun time

My Bff: Hey do want any coffee Me: yeh, of course My Bff: ok which one Me: You know…the black one Me: like my soul… My Bff: jeez you ok

Teacher: Describe a penguin

Student: Black, White, Beak

Teacher: Good, now describe an orphan

Student: Sad, maybe depressed, No family

Teacher: Amazing, now describe a cow

Student: Brown bun hair, red shirt, white skirt, pantyhose, and dollar tree shoes

Teacher: No! How does that describe a cow?

Student: It describes you tho.

what do you call a cow that is really sad? Utterly Depressed HEHEHEHE