Depression jokes
When I called the suicide hotline in Afghanistan, they got all excited and asked if I could fly a plane.
Wanna hear somethin' ironic? When one cutter tells another cutter to stop, but he himself can't stop cutting.
A man walks to the window and opens it and pulls out his phone and takes a photo. "One more picture and I'll jump." He takes another photo and shuts the window. "I can't jump, you're not supposed to throw trash out the window."
Dark humor is like a home; not everyone gets it.
Why are we depressed? Is it because of that bully in your school, or because you have acne? How about when you listen to your sad song playlist? Maybe it's because you have no friends? Or is it the fact your anime girlfriend is fake? T^T
If you ever feel depressed, drink some coffee.
Expresso, expresso, no more depresso!
Why can't depressed people leave the maze?
Because their lives are the walls and they are too scared to meet the exit.
I'm not a failure. Suuuurrrre.
Are you depression? 'Cause you're always on my mind~
What is the easiest line to draw in the hospital?
My heartbeat.
Sometimes a depressed person is antidepression.
Life is like a box of chocolates, mostly disappointing.
Why do orphans go to church?
So they have someone to call father.
Wow, Heaven's a lot hotter than I thought it'd be.
I liked my life when I first got it... Later they said no because I didn’t have the receipt.
Mom: You will make me kill myself.
Me who has cut first: I'll kill myself ✨first✨!
The more suicidal people there are, the less suicidal people there are.
It's muffi time, 'cause I wanna die, die, die.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Crippling depression.
Crippling depression who--?
Me.
An emo girl walks up to a tree to give it a high five... the tree left her hanging.