Death jokes
Alyas' dad died, that's comedy. Something not funny is like BLM.
Mufasa, proof that cats don't always land on their feet.
What does a bicycle and Jade Goody have in common?
They can't reach 30.
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his wife?
He wiped.
Your mum is so old that when I told her to act her age, she died.
what's the difference between an emo and an apple? the apple falls to the ground while the emo just hangs there.
Friends: "You wanna hang with us?"
Me: "No, I wanna hang myself."
You learn from the best.
My grandpa told me I was too dependent on devices. I told him he was a hypocrite and unplugged him from his life support.
What do alcoholics and necrophiliacs have in common?
They both like cracking open a cold one.
My initials are K.M.C.
Which could also stand for "Kill Main Character".
Which I am planning to do in this book I’m writing.
I’m writing an autobiography.
Michael Jackson died of shock when he found out Boys II Men wasn't a delivery service.
Why do old people swallow popcorn kernels?
To make their cremation more entertaining when they die.
Congrats to George Floyd on 2 years sobriety.
I told a crippled guy he is immortal because he can't kick the bucket.
That moment when the emo kid hangs himself in a bathroom stall, and the autistic kid thinks it's a pinata.
What's yellow and can't swim?
A dead goldfish.
My grandfather said I was too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
You have a six-minute timer to live, but when you breathe, it resets.
Why can't dinosaurs clap?
Because they're dead.
What's worse than a dead baby?
A pile of dead babies. What's worse than that? The one on the bottom is alive. And what's worst than that is, the baby has to eat its way out.