Where do suicide bombers go after death? Everywhere.
what did the grim reaper say when his favorite car commercial came on? Safe life repair, safe life replace!
I was crying when Sasha died in AOT, i also got jealous.
Sally threw herself a birthday party, and only one person showed up. Who is it?
The grim reaper
*An obese depressed mother is trying to tie a noose but can't reach it so she calls her son for help* *a few minutes later* son: there mother: where did you learn to tie such a good noose? son: dad showed me before he died mother: DAM HIM TO HE- *slips and noose chokes her to death*
Died and came back a cowboy, I call that reintarnation
An orphan, an emo, and an apple are on a tree. The apples get picked unlike the orphan, while the emo kid is already dead from hanging.
The last words my Dad spoke before he passed was, "Honey put down the knife we were only talking about getting a divorce."
What’s the difference between Nelson mindella and Paul Walker?
They both died at 95.
two husbands walk into a bar the first one says my wife is an angel the second one says your lucky mine is still alive
My dad died in 9/11, He was a great pilot
Doctor: you don't have long to live. 10... Patient: ten what? ten years, ten months? Doctor: 9... 8... 7...
yo mamma so stupid she starved to death in a groacy store
What noise does Steven hawkings make when he dies? Windows shutting down theme tune
My poem , roses are red violets are blue I will die very soon🔪
I’ll never forget my Granddad’s last words to me just before he died. “Are you still holding the ladder?”
What is the best thing about being buried alive or burning to death? No funeral costs
My uncle died on September 11. He was the greatest pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.
It want to die like my grandpa, with a blindfold and a wet sponge on his head
My friend had one request for me before he committed suicide, and that was to play Van Halen’s jump at his funeral
