I am going to be a ghost for Halloween. I actually want to be a ghost every day, because at least I'd be dead.
Dead Jokes
Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?
He was dead.
Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree?
He was also dead.
Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree?
Monkey see, monkey do.
Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree?
He was stapled to the first one.
What is worse to have - a dead baby or a dead Santa Claus?
Santa. You need extra freezers for reindeer.
What is more fun than spinning a clown around on a clothes line at 100 miles an hour?
Stopping it with a pitchfork.
Worried I am dead.
What's worse than ten dead babies nailed to one tree?
One dead baby nailed to ten trees.
What do you call a strong, independent girl in Haryana?
Dead.
What's worse than 2 dead babies in a trash bin? Two babies in one trash bin.
What do you call a dead hooker?
It doesn't matter, she won't answer you.
Dear Hearing People,
We, deaf people, ain’t dead. We can use our hands to talk, eat & fist your face to give you some 💡 awareness that we can understand you 💯 meanwhile we laugh at you 🤡 We can even dance via vibration through music.
Do you know the song w lyric like this 👇 *white b.... accent: Ohhh.. MY God BECKY.. L👀k at her butt. IT is SO BIG. *BIG BEAT DROP* I...LIKE...BIG...BUTT...I cannot LIE 👻 I promise we ain’t ghosting around - Brittany Rose.
A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter, so now I am dead!" Haha, it is funny because the squirrel gets dead.
What's better than a pile of dead babies?
One that's alive in the middle that has to eat its way out.
What do you call an orphan with parents?
Idk, I never met one before.
Bonus joke: I went up to an orphan and asked where his parents were. He said, "I don’t have any." I said, "Wonder why."
Another bonus joke: Me: Hey. Orphan: Hey. Me: What do you do for fun? Orphan: Look for my parents. Me: Me, so they're not dead? Orphan: No, they just abandoned me.
More bonus: What do you call a homeless kid?
An orphan.
Last bonus: Why don’t orphanages teach kids about home?
Because they can’t find one.
lmao this is so funny, dark humor can be funny. Sorry, orphans!
Hey, I just wanna be in bed. I just wanna stay ahead. I just feel like I am dead, And I like that color red. Hey, I am not the big fat loser, And you're just a big accuser, You user and excuser.
Say this to you sister, toxic BF, anyone :)
What did the cheese say to itself in the mirror?
"Haloomi."
NONCE
So I was at a class at school, and then boom, explosion. Lots of dead.
I shoot at the people too, haha, goodbye class. Scary.
On April 1st, there was a baby born in the hospital when the doctor, out of sudden, directly takes the baby from the mother and smashes as hard as he can to the wall.
The mother crying and yelling, "What did you do? You killed my Baby!! Why did you kill my Baby?"
The doctor just laughs and says, "April, April, it was already dead."
Hahaha
BRAKING NEWS!
Little Johnny's dead!
Why did Sally fall dead?
Because she was on top of a tower and fell because she had no arms. Hahahahaha!
