Did you know that graveyards are the most popular place in the world?
Yeah, people are just DYING to get in there...
What worse than a bag of dead babies? One at the bottom is still wriggling.
Two hunters were walking through the forest one day. All of the sudden, one of them passes out. The other hunter panics and dials 911. The emergency responder says, “911, what's your emergency?” The hunter replies, “My friend just passed out and I don’t know what to do! I think he might be dead!” The emergency responder replies, “Before you do anything, make sure he is dead.” The phone goes silent, and then the responder hears a gunshot. The hunter gets back on the phone and says, “Ok, now what?”
What do you call a zombie?
Nothing because zombies aren’t real and if they were you would be dead.
What do you tell a dead metal fan?
Rust in peace.
What do u call a downy under water
Dead fish
What does a dead baby look like? I don't know, I close my eyes when I masterbate
Fatty and Skinny were in a bed.
Fatty rolled over, and Skinny was dead.
Dead people jokes are the best there ground breaking.
Gvido gubis
How many dead kittens does it take to clog a pool filter? 7 when i tried
What's worse than waking up with a dead baby next to you? Realizing you were so drunk that you made love to it the night before...
Me: (pointing up in the air) "Everybody listen up, this is a robbery!"
Girl: "Dude, this is a library."
Me: "Oh." (screwing on a silencer)
My dick is red Your pussy's pink It's really tight When youre dead
A 90 year old man takes a Viagra Strips of naked lies down in a ally way three chicks walks on by a blond a brunette an a red head
The red head sed I'm not letting that go to waste so she strips of an rides him when she's finished The brunette then strips of naked an rides him the blonds now worried because she just got her period the red head sez he's dead don't let it go to waste so she strips of naked an rides him then he wakes up he then send wow two jump starts an a blood transfusion I'm good to go !
What do you call a dancing cow that dies while dancing?
Dead mooves.
What’s bad about swinging a dead baby above your head? Stopping it with the shovel
What do my baby and dinosaurs have in common? They are both dead.
Is Stephen Hawking a physicist now?
No, because he is dead.
*sing in music lesson* i want to die, i want to die, i want to choke myself, break my neck and die.
