I’ll never forget my Grandfather’s last words to me just before he died. “Are you still holding the ladder?”
The depressed kid tried to high five the tree.
But the tree left him hanging!
Dark humor and women are very similar...
Not everyone appreciates them, but they both give everyone something to make fun of.
Where did Lucy go after the bombing?
Everywhere.
Q: What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
A: Neither of them get to see their parents.
What's the difference in Japanese Kamikaze and 9/11?
There is none, they both go up in flames.
God sent a kid to the principal's office for giving a blind kid sunglasses and said, "Don't let the sun damage your eyes!"
Why can't emos have ADD?
'Cause they are already scatter-brained.
What does Joe Biden call a room full of kids? A toy room.
What do you call a suicide bomber under the water?
A bath bomb.
Riddler: Riddle me this, are you scared of the big black?
Person: Big black what?
Riddler: ...
Person: I'm scared of what you mean because you won't tell me what you mean.
My dad told me a joke one time. When I realized the joke, the second tower was hit.
I wrote an essay today about Africa, and I FAILED even though I wrote a perfect rendition of the Hunger Games storyline.
I got in trouble at school today because I told the teacher at school with COVID to stay positive.
How to get into politics?
Fail art school.
Q: What do you get when you cross Viagra and Donald Trump?
A: Erection fraud. (Just a joke.)
School shooting: Happens.
Foreign Exchange Student: Starts sobbing under desk.
American Student: "First time?"
Bligitty blot, bliggity blit,
You better not be talkin' shit. 🔫
Two simple steps to get 15,000 people to follow you:
Step 1: Buy a bottle of water (doesn't matter the size).
Step 2: Run through Africa with that bottle of water.
Perfect! Now you got yourself half the population there following you!
What's the worst place to teach an orphan? Homeschool.
