Conflict jokes
Why is America better than Japan at rapping?
Because we're better at dropping bombs.
Clarie: I don't even care if it was a joke he made on me, you and Karlen, and if you think I'm getting over it, then you must have an oatmeal for a brain.
Jordan: Clarie ... you are so sensitive when she tells a little joke about you, me, and Karlen.
Clarie: It was painful!
Jordan: Who cares? I laughed. Ben is not a bad person, okay, calm down.
Clarie: Ben is a bad person. We are making friends with a bully/thug, but you say that he is not a "bad person", my mom is going to kill me if she finds out that I am hanging out with those kinds of people!
Jordan: Then don't tell her! Listen, I need you, give Ben a chance! Please?
Clarie: Shush, Karlen is coming!
Karlen: Hey guys, that Ben guy for sure has a way of saying words, I wish I could hurt him!!
Jim: My grandpa fought in the army during World War Two. He was an officer.
Me: Cool, what rank of officer?
Jim: SS.
Me:...
When the quiet kid has an argument with the school shooter, and you didn't get to pull out the AK.
What do you call a person who died in war?
Little Johnny.
My dad has the heart of a soldier, and a restraining order from the soldier's family.
Why did Germany win World War Two? Wait—that's not right... um... excuse me while I look up who won the war...
*disconnected*
When I called the suicide hotline in Afghanistan, they got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.
I called a suicide hotline in Iraq. They got excited and asked if I could drive a truck.
What do you call six gay men at war? Rainbow Six Siege.
What do U.S. airstrikes and dark humor have in common?
They're normally pointed towards Africa and the Middle East.
What do you call a food fight that's been going on for years?
A war of nutrition.
What's the difference between a terrorist base and an elementary school?
I don't know, I'm just the drone pilot.
Americans don't like playing chess with Muslims; last time they did play, they ended up losing two towers.
Hello Honey Bunches, it's me, Your Narrator. I was told by my buddy youthpartorryan he's in the middle of a war... I may be super wholesome but war against my buddy? Ho ho ho, no! A STORM IS COMING. #BestFriends
Say, Aiden, are you and Gwen dating? Oooo, you and her sitting in a tree, K.I.S.S.I.N.G., then comes the romance, then comes engagement, then comes the wedding, and then the baby! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Then comes cheating and arguments, and then D.I.V.O.R.C.E.!!!!!!!!!!!!
Aiden + Gwen = Husband and wife! HAHAHAHAHAHA!
Girlfriend and boyfriend!!!!!!!!
I heard World War 50000000 in my parent's room.
I heard World War 500000 in my parents'.
I've spent most of my life avoiding conflict. That's why I'm never intending to visit Syria.
I popped some fireworks and told my Vietnamese grandfather that World War 3 started.