Comparison jokes
Obesity kills thousands of times more Americans than shooting does, which teaches us an important lesson:
Shooters do poorly given the size of their targets.
A nickname to call your short GF:
Little ankle biter Master Yoda Hasbula My little Ewok
Bro, your hairline and an athletics track have one thing in common: they look like Humpty Dumpty.
What's the difference between a piranha and a teenage girl?
The piranha doesn't wear makeup.
What do sex and food have in common?
Grandma makes both better.
What does my arm have in common with paper?
They both can be cut.
What’s the difference between erotic and kinky?
Erotic is usually a feather. Kinky is using the whole chicken.
What does a race track and your hairline have in common? They both go up and down.
I like my coffee like my women.
Amateur.
Water bottles, strong, Standing tall, like sturdy men, Quenching every thirst.
Clear and transparent, Reflecting strength and resolve, Resilient and pure.
In hand, they offer Refreshing relief, like hugs, Soothing every soul.
Water bottles, like men, Nourish and hydrate our lives, Simple yet vital.
Carrie Underwood and ChatGPT are not the same. ChatGPT is able to create a soul.
Gary Glitter was imprisoned for inappropriate relations with preteens. Not to be outdone, Kelly Clarkson exclaimed, "Hold my Bud Light!" whilst grasping her 1-year-old daughter.
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are all in the 9th grade. Which one is the sexiest?
The blonde, because she’s the only one who’s 18.
What do dark humor and a person with scoliosis have in common?
Both are sick and twisted.
What is the difference between a woman and ice? The ice always comes back.
How do you know someone has Down syndrome?
They're doing better than you.
I like my women like I like my wine. 16 and locked in my in a basement.
Your hairline design was used as the Batman logo!
What's one thing you can say about your house, but not your girlfriend?
"I wish it were this color, why is it leaking there, I need help trimming the grass I mean bushes, I own it."
The only thing drier than these jokes is your mom.