Comparison jokes
Yo mama is so ugly, she made dirt look like a supermodel.
Does that dick match that forehead? 👀
What's the similarities between anonymous and a cow? I think you know...
What's the difference between you and a bench?
A bench can hold a family.
What's the difference between you and an egg?
An egg gets laid.
Your hairline is like a lollipop because every time someone licks it, it gets shorter.
What do pretzels and a corrupt government have in common?
They are both twisted.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I thought the Grinch was ugly until I saw you.
You're shorter than a thumbtack, like, boy, your auntie is probably taller than you.
1, 2 you built like a dork.
3, 4 you got no girl, 4, 5 you're shorter than a remote.
Fam, you weaker than a polar bear!
An orphan comes up to me and says, "You're ugly." I said, "You remind me of Spider-Man: No Way Home."
What’s the difference between life and a rape joke?
Life fucks you until you stop breathing; a rape joke fucks you until it’s not funny anymore.
Girls: Boys are like games, they're meant to get played.
Boys: Girls are like stones, the flat ones get skipped.
Fat chicks be like, "Am I fox pretty, bunny pretty, cat pretty, or deer pretty?" Like none, bitch, you elephant pretty. 😭😭😭
What is the difference between the National Organization For Carpet Munchers and the National Organization For Women?
The National Organization For Women has more experience in being a carpet muncher because they eat more pussy.
What's the difference between me and a rope?
A rope will hang with you.
What is the difference between an emo kid and a jug of milk?
The milk doesn't hang itself after it gets dumped.
What's the difference between you and a Barbie? There is no difference. Both of your faces are fake.
what do baby’s and grenades have in common?
They both are silent but then when thrown at someone make a loud noise