Comparison jokes
I respect cancer more than I respect depression.
At least cancer has the balls to kill you himself.
What is the difference between Betty White and Paul Walker?
Betty didn’t reach 100 before she died.
What is the difference between a preschool and my basement?
Little kids leave preschool.
What do emo kids and bats have in common?
They both hang from trees.
Fuck people who are bigger than me physically, emotionally, mentally, economically, and socially.
Ryan, I laid out more jokes than you have crying about me!
Roses are red, violets are blue, I pray God I'm not so ugly as you.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, I thank God I'm not as ugly as you.
Your hairline is more bent than James Charles' gender.
If I wanted to kill myself, I would climb to the top of your ego then jump to your IQ.
Why use Heathrow when we have your forehead?
What's the difference between a child and a carrot? About 140 calories.
What makes William Afton and a boomerang common?
They always come back.
"Trust falling" with a bridge is more trustworthy than me.
What's the difference between a peanut and a priest?
With a peanut, you have to break the shell open for the nut to come out.
Roses are red, violets are blue, you look like Honey Boo Boo!
Yo mama so fat, her future is brighter than VY Canis Majoris!
Yo mama is so fat that she's bigger than the cinematic Marvel Universe.
Yo mama so far, she makes the Statue of Freedom look like a 6-inch action figure.
Yo mama so fat she makes the sun look like a dwarf star!