Comparison jokes
What’s the difference between life and a rape joke?
Life fucks you until you stop breathing; a rape joke fucks you until it’s not funny anymore.
Girls: Boys are like games, they're meant to get played.
Boys: Girls are like stones, the flat ones get skipped.
Fat chicks be like, "Am I fox pretty, bunny pretty, cat pretty, or deer pretty?" Like none, bitch, you elephant pretty. 😭😭😭
What is the difference between the National Organization For Carpet Munchers and the National Organization For Women?
The National Organization For Women has more experience in being a carpet muncher because they eat more pussy.
What's the difference between me and a rope?
A rope will hang with you.
What is the difference between an emo kid and a jug of milk?
The milk doesn't hang itself after it gets dumped.
What's the difference between you and a Barbie? There is no difference. Both of your faces are fake.
what do baby’s and grenades have in common?
They both are silent but then when thrown at someone make a loud noise
Roses are red, violets are blue, a face like yours belongs in a place worse than a zoo.
Egg shaped, dome, bowling ball lookin' ass, bald fuck with that 360 degrees ahh head, motherfucker look like a damn balloon.
Call me Kobe 'cause I'm finna use your head as a basketball and throw it at yo' parents. Mr. Clean, bootleg Saitama lookin' ass mfer. No hair? :(
Your hair line is curved like a moving train.
What is the difference between Putin and Hitler? Putin no longer supplies gas and Hitler gives it away for free.
Your mama so fat, it took all the trees to build her a coffin.
Your hairline is so bad it was used as the Starbucks logo!
If your hairline was a river, it would meander left, right, and backwards.
The tables in my class are straight, but I can’t say the same thing for your hairline.
Your leg is straighter than James Charles.
What is the difference between a prisoner and an orphan?
One of them is wanted.
Yo mama so fat, Zeus used her as a bowling ball.
"One man's trash is another man's treasure."
It's a wonderful phrase, but a terrible way to find out you're adopted.