What do ninjas and depressed people have in common?
They're always cutting.
Comparison Jokes
You ever notice that the USA could be a part of Russia?
RUSSIA US A
Girls are like rocks, the flat ones get skipped.
Your hairline is like Mr. Clean's... nonexistent!
I'm pretty sure that 9/11 was the biggest game of Jenga ever recorded in history.
My sister and a basketball got certain things in common.
My sister's tits and ass are bouncy like a basketball.
What's the difference between a baby and a potato? 140 calories.
You know the difference between me and a zebra? Me neither.
Yo hairline so long, it makes you look like Mr. Clean.
Your hairline is so far back, even Vegeta laughed at it!
What's the difference between Johnny Depp and an orphan?
An orphan is more capable of speaking clearly.
Life is like a penis. It is short.
What's bigger than the Milky Way?
Michael Jackson's nose.
I'm not saying I'm ugly...
But when I'm watching porn, the hot, sexy women in my area always pop up and ask me if I'm rich.
What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Holocaust victim?
Harry made it out of the chamber.
Your hairline is so curvy now, Ice Spice has competition!
Holy shit there's so many yo mama jokes. Here's mine: Yo mama so skinny she used a cheerio as a hula hoop.
Yo mama so fat that she made a plane unstable and crashed it into the Twin Towers.
Yo mama so old that she has Jesus's autograph.
Yo mama so ugly that not even makeup can save her.
Yo mama so dumb that she thought Rocket League was a competition between kids in wheelchairs.
Your forehead is deeper than the ocean.
What's the difference between me and a hairdresser? We both cut too much.
- Yo mama is so fat, when she wears a yellow dress, people yell "Taxi!"
- Yo mama is so stupid, she tried to climb Mountain Dew.
- Yo mama is so ugly, she made a blind kid cry.
- Yo mama is so old, she knew Burger King when he was still a prince.
- Yo mama is so poor, she can't even afford to pay attention.
