Comedy jokes

Can I branch out to some tree puns? Willow you allow me it’s only fur. No? Oakome on!

I'd make 9/11 jokes, but they'd just crash and burn.

Not totally a joke but... What do all these rape joke naysayers have in common with rapists? They are also forcing themselves on others.

I would say a good joke, but all the good ones Argon.

What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves?

Christopher Walken.

I'm starting a clown shoe store.

It's no small feat! :oD

Q: What is Trump?

A: An oversized oompa loompa.

Some girl just walks into my 6th period geography class. The first thing I think is, "Oh shit! It's mini Regina George without titties!"

Orphans are funny cuz all they do is sing "We Are Family."

I dated a furry once.

The relationship didn't work out, she was a cheetah.

So, I tell my friend a pun about Bach. She freaks out. Then I say, "I hope that wasn't too much to Handel. Don't let it Strauss you out."

For all of my musicians out there!

Why can't orphans watch "The Simpsons"?

Because they don't know who's Homer.

Jokes about menstruation are not funny. Period.

I tried to tell an orphan a knock-knock joke, but sadly, there was no door to knock on.

What's the Pixar movie close to being a pornstar? Toy Story... *I got a friend in me*

These murder jokes are just KILLING me!

I am an actual police officer (Not gonna mention with which department in case they actually check this site) and tbh I find these jokes funny as fuck, carry on boys.

Your forehead is so huge, you don't have dreams, you have movies. Follow me on Instagram: _zer0x3.

Seriously, who wants fucking Annoying Orange as president?

Why does Stephen Hawking do one-liners? -- Because he can't do stand up.