Chocolate jokes
If you were a food, what would you be?
Friend 1: "Pizza, cause I'm so cheesy."
Friend 2: "Chocolate chip cookie, cause I have lots of friends."
Me: "Donut, cause I'm so empty inside."
What did Stephen Hawking get for his B-Day?
Chocolate arm.
The mother and her daughter went to the store. After they arrived, the daughter looked around and ran off somewhere. The mother realized this and took off looking for her. After a while, she found her tugging on a black man. The mother asked, "What are you doing?" and the daughter replied, "I wan't the chocolate!"
What’s the difference between people and chocolate? I can still buy dark chocolate.
Life is like a box of chocolates, mostly disappointing.
What is a necrophiliac's favorite candy? A Hearsey's Kiss.
Guy: Why can't Jesus have M&M's?
Priest: Why?
Guy: Because they'll fall through the hole in his hands.
What's brown and hurts your teeth?
A chocolate?
No. A baseball bat in my hands.
What did Sally get for Easter?..
Nail polish.
Chuck Norris can make an omelet from Kinder surprise.
I don't see why Africans complain about not having water. They have free chocolate milk.
Kids are like a box of chocolates, they taste so good and you never know what you are going to get.
Why was the blonde fired from the M&M factory?
For throwing out the W's.
I like my women like I like my chocolate.
Edible.
What do you call diarrhea from a hot woman? Chocolate milk.
What do you call diarrhea from a fat woman? Arsenic.
What is a spaceman’s favorite chocolate?
A Mars bar!
The reason why Steven H. died was that someone poisoned his chocolate mousse.
What do you get when a dog that is actually a Weeto is caught in an earthquake?
Just like a chocolate milkshake, only crunchy!
Your forehead looks like the inside of a Malteser.
What did the chocolate dentist say to the other chocolate dentist? Did you "chip" a tooth?