Childhood jokes

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they can't find home plate.

What do you call an orphan's family portrait?

A selfie.

Two kids are out in the cold, with downpours of snow erupting from the clouds.

One of the kids says something: "Can we build a snowman that is going through puberty?"

The other kid says something else: "Yes. It sounds cool."

After a while, the snowman was finished, and some words jut out of the first kid's mouth: "Wow! Look at that snowman! It's got hair all over, but I think it's missing something though."

The other kid jumps a little and begins speaking: "Oh, I know what it is!"

After a while, a body part made of a carrot and two cucumbers appears on the snowman's crotch. It is a penis and a ballsack.

The first kid speaks: "Icy what you did there."

The other kid replies: "Good thing I didn't slip up there."

The first kid replies: "Well, that's snow problem."

The other kid then uttered this: "These puns would make the most frigid individual crack up."

The first kid then says: "I know, right?"

They then begin a snowball fight.

The other kid then says: "Only the men have snowballs!"

You look like a 2 year old drawing that came alive.

So little Johnny was walking to the bathroom, and he said, "Grandma," said, "why is the blood coming out of your ###😥 I need to call help."

A 6-year-old told the class the first time she got AIDS. The teacher listened. She said she scraped her knee. The girl was sent to an asylum. When she got out, she was 20. She had AIDS.

What did Little Johnny say to his dad?

Johnny: "Dad, please not again! I'm too young!"

What does an orphan say a lot? "Where is my house?"

Why don't orphans play baseball? Cause they don't know where home is!

How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?

You tell them to clap till their parents come home.

As a kid, I used to eat a sour herb from a certain spot near a rock.

Now I pee on it, just following the ritual of Africa.

Little Johnny likes to play with toy guns.

Little Johnny paints them black.

Little Johnny went to a gun store.

Little Johnny made a big mess.

The cemetery people were getting paid.

One time Little Johnny saw someone in his yard tying a rope to a tree, and he moved the stool and the tree broke. Little Johnny screamed, "HAHA! You're skinny enough to break the tree!"

Why don't orphans go to the park?

Because their parents aren't there to push them on the swing!

The best thing about an orphan? They don’t have to suffer from "your mama" jokes.

Mommy kisses my butt.

What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?

An apple actually gets picked.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they can't find home.

Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home.

Orphan: I want to be a relator.

Teacher: Why?

Orphan: Because I never had one in my childhood.