Childhood jokes
"Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? You're adopted. Haley says she likes me more than you."
What did Little Johnny say to his dad?
Johnny: "Dad, please not again! I'm too young!"
How do you get an orphan to go to sleep?
Tell them their parents are waiting when they wake up.
Little Johnny sits on a chair. He notices he is sitting on something. Then he sees a plastic di**. He asks his mom, "What's that?" and Mom didn't know, so when his dad comes home from work, he sees him with the plastic di** and says, "Son, why you messing with my personal toy?"
Why do orphans suck at baseball? Because they never could play catch.
When my dad left, he said he would bring back the milk, but 20 years later he only came with my new sister and eggs. And I confronted him, and he said, "I used all the milk to make your sister."
"Sticks and stones break my bones."
A crowbar does it so much quicker.
Why can't orphans go to sleepovers?
Their parents never say yes.
When you get home and see your parents with your grades in their hands.
Twenty minutes later, they're slapping you with the belt.
Twinkle, twinkle little star. I hope I'll get hit by a car. I am not dead yet, I hope I'll die. I hope I'll be born to a new whole life.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple? Apples get picked.
What is an orphan's family reunion called?
Me time.
Why do orphans not care about sleep? Because they have no one to wake up to.
"Ryan, come out to play-ee-ay!!"
As siblings, we always joke about being adopted. It stops being funny when you're playing in your parents' room and find both of your adoption papers. : )
Jack and Jill went up the hill to find their dad again.
I kept asking these kids where their parents are, and they started crying. I walked away laughing, thinking I love my job at an orphanage.
Why couldn't the orphan play baseball?
He could not find home.
What's an orphan's favorite movie?
Spider-Man: No Way Home >:D
One day, Little Johnny needs to use the bathroom. His mom is in there, so he went in to use it and asked his mom, "What is that between your legs?"
His mom told him that is her bush. Then the next day the same thing happened, but with his dad. He asked his dad, "What is that between his legs?" He said, "My snake."
The same thing happened one more time, except with his grandmother. Little Johnny asked grandma what is on her chest. She said, "My headlights."
One night, Little Johnny caught his parents doing something naughty. Then he said, "Grandma, grandma, turn on your headlights! Daddy's snake is trying to get into mommy's bush!"