One day, little Johnny and little Susan were in bible class. Little Susan had been tired that day, so she kept falling asleep. The teacher said to little Susan, "Who is our Lord and Savior?" Little Johnny poked her in the butt with a push pin, and she yelled, "Jesus Christ!" The teacher goes, "That's right, go back to bed." Then, the next thing the teacher asked was, "Who gave up their son for our sins?" Little Johnny poked her again, and she yelled, "God Almighty!" The teacher says, "That's right, go back to bed." The next question the teacher asked was, "What did Adam say to Eve after their 13th child?" Little Johnny poked her in the butt again. She yelled, "If you stick that thing in me again, I am going to break it in half and shove it up your own ass and see how you like it!"
What's the difference between a Doberman Pinscher and a Social Worker?
Eventually, you can get a baby back from a Doberman Pinscher.
We are always joking around about being adopted, when really we are still living in the orphanage.
What do 3-year-old boys say after going to confession?
"My bum hurts!"
Why can’t orphans go on school field trips?
[Parent’s signature: __________]
What part is usually missing in an orphan’s computer system?
Motherboard.
Someone went up to an orphan and asked him why he was talking to the air. He said he was talking to his mom.
We need to stop making jokes about orphans. They will tell their parents. Oh wait...
I love telling jokes about orphans.
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find their home base.
A pedophile is at a school parent night. He's holding hands with an eight-year-old girl when he's approached by another parent. She says to him, "Oh, what a darling little girl you have there." The pedophile replies, "No," then points his finger to a child across the room and says, "That's my child."
What's the best thing about f*cking twenty-eight-year-olds?
There's twenty of them.
Why did the family move away?
Because they lost their son.
Why do orphans never play baseball?
'Cause they can never get a home run.
What's red and bubbly and scratches at the microwave glass?
A baby in the microwave!
What if little Johnny was doing drugs?
"Johnny, Johnny?"
"Yes, Papa?"
"Eating sugar?"
"No, Papa..."
What are the three worst years of a black child's life?
First grade!
Why did the orphan sit alone in the corner?
They wanted some family time.
I gave a blind kid a hand grenade and told him it's a beyblade.
In 2001, my parents took me to 9/11. I was soaring towards it with excitement!
