Child jokes
I saw an orphan and I said, "Yo."
He said, "What do you want?"
I said, "To be your new father."
"Really??!" the orphan said.
Me: Lol, no.
Orphan *Jumps into street*
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home base.
Child: Goodnight Mommy. Goodnight Daddy. Goodnight Grandma. Goodbye Grandpa!
Dad: Wait, why are you saying that?
Child: I just felt like it.
The next day, the Grandpa is dead.
Dad: That's just a VERY scary coincidence.
Child: Goodnight Mommy. Goodnight Daddy. Goodbye Grandma.
Dad: Wait, why are you saying that?
Child: I just felt like it.
The next day, the Grandma is dead.
Dad: That's just a VERY scary coincidence.
Child: Goodnight Mommy, Goodbye Daddy!
Dad: Oh no. If I survive until tomorrow, everything will be okay!
Survives until tomorrow.
Dad: Whew! That was nice! *Goes to house*
Mom: Honey! I was so worried about you! The mailman just dropped dead on our porch!
(If you don't get it, the mailman is the biological father)
I molested a child today, and it felt quite lovely on my penis! 👍
Why can't an orphan read?
He couldn't go to school without a parent's signature.
children?
My wife is pregnant with a 3-year-old, so I gave her medicine, but now she’s pregnant with a 5-year-old.
I just prevented a 10-year-old from getting assaulted.
Nothing much, I just decided to go home.
What's the difference between a little boy and a freezer?
The freezer doesn't scream when you put your meat in it.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apple always gets picked.
"Addison, are you one of those kids who are very, very, very, very smart? Because you sound like one."
I saw a kid crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. God, I love working in an orphanage.
Whoever is an orphan and wants these to go, or if you just want them to go away, comment down below, or if you can't comment, give it a thumbs up!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
'Cause there's no home base...
What do you call a parent that is pregnant?
Buy one, get one free.
What do the N and F in "orphan" stand for?
"No family."
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can never get a home run. 😭
Stranger: Do you want a lollipop?
Kid: No, I hate lollipops, so yeah, and you are not my daddy.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They can’t find home.
Why can't orphans go to a friend's house?
Because they can't make themselves at home.
What's the difference between me and a rapist?
He forced her, while I convinced her with a candy.
She was just 7 years old.