Cheese jokes
What do you call cheese that is not your cheese?
Not yo cheese!
Cheesiest jokes.
Yo mama so fat, when she ate one cheeseburger, she pooped it out immediately because her butt was too big.
Why was the cheese always so confident? Because it had such a "gouda" self-image.
Last week was my blind friend's birthday. I thought I would give him something really good that he may need.
As I walk into his house and give him a cheese grater for a birthday present, he sets it next to him. As weeks pass, he comes up to me. He said, "That present that you gave me for my birthday was the most intense book I have ever read!"
If you feel sad, or you feel that you are not loved... You're with mushroom pizza.
What do you call a sexually attracted pizza who spoons another pizza?
A Topping.
Prostitutes remind me of chewese.
What do you call an amazing goat?
A goat-zing.
Someone cutting the cheese then farted.
Someone sees the cheese, and it smelled like crap (literally). He said, "Who cut the cheese?"
A mom and her son are taking a walk when they pass a homeless man fapping. The boy asks, "What is that man doing?" The mom says, "Making pizza," trying to turn him away.
The son sees a dog fucking another dog and he asks the same thing. She says, "Making extra cheese." When they pass a window and see a couple doing it, he asks the same thing. She says, "Ordering the pizza."
Later that day, the mother says to the father, "I think I want to order some pizza with extra cheese tonight, don't know why that sounds good."
So that night, the husband who was watching tv yelled up the stairs, "Wanna order some pizza!?"
The mother replied, "DON'T WORRY I'M MAKING SOME!"
The son's voice followed, "I'M ADDING EXTRA CHEESE!"
Why were the people on the World Trade Center so pissed?
People, they ordered pepperoni pizza, but they got plane.
Have you heard the latest pun about pizza?
Never mind. It’s too cheesy!
What goes with chips?
Not your cheese.
Three boy chihuahua were hot about this girl chihuahua. She tells them, "I will date whichever one of you can use liver and cheese in the same sentence."
First dog says, "I love cheese, but liver is bland."
She replies, "Really original."
Next dog, "I love liver, but cheese makes me constipated."
She replies, "Ew, gross."
Third dog steps up, "Man, liver alone cheese mine."
Winner dog 3.
What does a gynecologist and delivery driver have in common?
Whenever they’re hungry, they can just scrape a little cheese off the top of the box.
What did the cow say to the cheese? I am your father.
What do you call a cow that's laying down? Ground Beef.
If a school shooter walks into a classroom and shoots an autistic kid, what does the kid say? "Why do I look like Swiss cheese?"
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese. Okay, I can't do this anymore.
What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
What do you call a pile of cheese? A cheese grater.