I'm so poor that I had to rob a food bank for a loaf of bread.
I built a website for an orphanage, but it had no homepage.
Why do crabs never give to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
Hahahahahahahaha what a knee slapper!
Me: Can I have your chair? 💺 You: Why? Me: For charity.
Boosterthon asks to raise up to $35,000.
I donate $35,000. I ask, "What's my prize?" Boosterthon worker says, "Here's a headband." Me: "I donated the goal, so is that it?" Boosterthon worker: "No, it's $35,000 per person." I pass out. Boosterthon worker goes back to work like it is a regular day.
There are 4 people in a line. Three stand up and say "We are standing up for cancer," and then there's the one in the wheelchair.
100% of blind people in Africa can't see. Together, we can stop this.
A UN survey asked the following: Please, in your honest opinion, could you give your thoughts on the food shortages in the rest of the world?
It was a failure because:
South Americans don’t know the word “please.”
Eastern Europeans don’t know the word “honest.”
Middle Easterns don’t know the word “opinion.”
Balkans don’t know the word “give.”
Chinese don’t know the word “thoughts.”
Africans don’t know the word “food.”
Western Europeans don’t know the word “shortage.”
Americans don’t know the words “the rest of the world.”
Then they simply explained “just donate healthy food to the global south to help.” But that still didn’t sit right with everyone, because Israelis do not know the word “donate,” and Pacific Islanders do not know the words “healthy food.”
"Have you ever heard of the snail that never gives charity?"
"Yeah, he is so shellfish!"
Why don’t oysters give to charity?
Because they’re shellfish! 😂
