Chair jokes
One time I ate a chair.
Dad: Where is my son?
Son: Come join me with musical chairs, except we stand on them.
Dad: Ok, so do we put this round our neck?
Son: YES!
Mum: AHHHHHHHHHHHH
How many Quebecers does it take to change a lightbulb?
4!
One to hold the bulb, two to turn the chair he's standing on, and one to sing "Alouette, gentille alouette!"
What's a chairmaker's favorite flavor?
Chair-y.
A chair came to life and said, "I'm alive!"
I said, "Yes, I know I am."
He has been expecting you…
Best website ever 4 chair.
How do you end an argument with an emo? Kick the chair.
A guy walks into a bar, then a table, and then a chair.
Yo momma so fat, when she pulled out the chair, it screamed and broke itself.
A boy is sitting in a dentist chair getting braces, and a dentist comes in and says, "Brace yourself!"
How do you win a game of musical chairs? You steal the chair!
Yo mamma so fat, when she tried to sit down the chair ran away.
A man is on his deathbed in prison by electric chair.
The man who controls the chair asks for any last words.
The prisoner replies with: “Can you hold my hand?”
I got pranked so many times. Once I saw two wheels rolling down the street. I heard this noise. I looked behind me. There's a legless man in a wheelless chair screaming, "HELP! I CAN'T GO ANYWHERE!" but I walked away. I knew it was a prank.
One day, I sit in the lounge on a chair.
How do you win an argument against a emo? kick the chair.
Why did the grandmother put wheels on her rocking chair?
... she likes to rock and roll lol.
How would Steven Hawking's mom punish him as a kid?
Power off his chair.
Shrek once went to the movies and when he sat down he felt this slimy and sticky feeling on the chair, so he stood up and complained about his chair being dirty... until he realized that he forgot to wipe earlier... so he stopped complaining and went back to his chair and sat back down.
My sister Wani is a dwarf, so I sit on her as a chair.