Chair jokes
My girlfriend broke up with me, so I took her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?
When fat people sit down at a restaurant, and you listen closely, you can hear the chair screaming.
When fat people sit down at a restaurant, you can hear the chair screaming.
What did the cow say to the leather chair?
“Hi Mom!”
What did the booty say to the chair?
"You complete me!"
Why did the chair file a restraining order?
The booty wouldn't stop cracking up!
Why did the rapper sit on the stool?
Because he had too much FLOW to stand still!
How can one make Death Row a little more fun?
Musical electric chairs.
Today I was at PE, and I saw a kid in a wheelchair. I threw a basketball at him, and I yelled, "Rocket League!"
What do you call a person in a wheelchair with a speaker?
Rolling Loud 🎸🎸
My neighbor has been mad at his wife for sunbathing nude. I personally am on the fence.
When a person in a wheelchair says, "You've never taken a step in my shoes," and you say, "To be honest, you haven't either."
My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair. She came crawling back!
Yo mamma so fat, when she tried to sit down the chair ran away.
My friend and I were joking about a kid in a wheelchair, and another kid came up and said to the wheelchair kid, "You should stand up for yourself."
Me: Can I have your chair? 💺 You: Why? Me: For charity.
Principal: “Why did you have to skip class? Because of that detention!”
Kid: “Whatever!”
Principal: “Why did you have to swear? Because of that one demerit!”
Kid: “Doesn't matter!”
Principal: “Why did you yell at a teacher and throw a chair at them? Because of that you're suspended!”
Kid: “Oh well!”
Principal: “Why did you have to push a kid down the stairs and kill them? Because of that you're expelled!”
Kid: “I'm trying not to kill myself!”
*Me walking into the nail salon* Hi, I'm here for my 3:45 appointment.
*Nail tech:* Ok, sweety, come and sit down.
*Me sits down in the chair*
*Nail tech:* You want long nail, short nail? Um, long nail. You want boyfriend?!! Yes, ma'am. Ok, let me work magic. Ok.
*gives me short nail* Bro, I asked for long nail, but you said BF, but u look lesbian.
*walks out without paying*
*Nail tech gives money to a customer* There u win.
*customer:* I told u she would.
Wheelchair soccer is just IRL Rocket League. Change my mind.
I was trying to hang the lights when I accidentally kicked the chair.